Another attempt...

I've really had a hard time keeping this up! I think posting everyday, but one thing leads to another and it never gets done. There are two main obstacles in my way: 1- I don't feel like I do much in a day that would be meaningful enough to post about and 2- I've wanted to use this as my gratitude journal but I want them to be meaningful, not just a list of all the *things* for which I am grateful.

But I love Annee's blog so much that I want to do my part and post as well.

I have been very busy at school the last few weeks. I feel SO LUCKY to be a part of such a great accounting program at BYU. At our MAcc orientation meeting our director told us "it is no accident that you are where you are in this program at this school." It is reassuring to know that all of this work I am putting in, all of the 15 hour days in the Tanner Building, are building towards some ultimate purpose. Now that I am in my second year in the program, I have gotten more comfortable with my classmates and have built some meaningful friendships. I've made it a point to force myself to stretch and grow and become better at being open and befriending the people around me. Focusing on getting to know my classmates has made being at school all day so much fun. I really am so lucky.

Last weekend I did get a chance to get out and play with my friends. We went up to the Utah State Fair for some good fried food and people watching. It was quite an experience! A highlight was the deep fried Twinkies and Oreos we found. I had heard about this new carnival food phenomenon but had never tried it. The four of us split one of each and wow are they good! The Oreos get all soft and warm and the Twinkie starts to melt. You definitely don’t need more than a few bites since before too long the weight (both mental and physical) of the fried food becomes too much. Nonetheless it was worth it!

Above me and Courtney with the fried Oreos and Twinkie

Teatherball is alot harder than I remember it being in elementary school!!

Here's to another start :-)

New neighbors

I spent much of the last week moving from the first floor of my apartment complex to the fourth floor. Deciding where to live has been a major dilemma for me as my original arrangements fell through and I was scrambling last minute to come up with a new solution. But after much thought and pondering on the matter, I've decided to stay in Old Academy and take my chances on new roommates.

Today I finally moved all my stuff upstairs. I am so glad this complex has an elevator! I was able to load up shopping carts of stuff, take the elevator upstairs, unload and repeat. Since my new room is exactly the same as my old room I don't have to spend any time agonizing over room layout or closet organization. I literally took the packed drawers out of my old desk and dresser and put them into my new desk and dresser. This is definitely the best way to move!

Today I met a few of the people who will be living around me and a couple kids from the ward. So far all interactions have been pleasant and exciting. I am in the process of learning how I get answers and trying to be more aware of when it happens. I am so grateful for the quiet assurances I have received that I have made the right decision.

Tonight I'm feeling quite hopeful. :-)

A passing smile

I am in training for the St. George Marathon. I've run a couple before so the process isn't completely new to me. The training is not the most enjoyable experience but for some reason it's very important to me. (That could be a whole different discussion which I should save for a different time...) I am in the most intense part of the training which calls for long runs every weekend. Last weekend was 18 miles.

I woke up early and drove myself up Provo Canyon with plans to run from a few miles above Vivian Park down to my apartment. I was running the course of the Provo 1/2 Marathon which I had run the week before but adding on an extra 5 miles to make it home and make the total distance required.

The first 5 miles were pretty solitary except for a few hard core bikers pushing up the canyon. Although I like running with large crowds like in a race, I really don't like when there are a lot of people running towards me. It's so awkward! Do you look at them or not, do you wave or not, will they say hello and if so what do you say in response, do I look really awful (as I do when I'm on mile 12 of 18...), etc.. All this anxiety may seem ridiculous but there isn't much else to do while running but notice the people around you and over analyze your potential interactions.

On this day I was taking the basic smile and slightly nod while looking straight ahead approach. Most people passed without much incident until up ahead I saw an older woman approaching on a bike. She was a little bigger and awkward but riding steadily towards me. I began my decision making process about how I was going to handle this passerby.

Finally we were close enough and I looked up to give my slight smile and nod. Unexpectedly, the bike woman looked back at me with the biggest, warmest, most excited smile I've seen and gave a quick cheerful hello! In a couple seconds we had passed each other but I had tingles all over which lasted a couple hundred yards. I can't explain what was different about this person but in those few, brief seconds she made me feel so good. I was energized and uplifted and able to run with renewed energy through the last few miles of my run. It was exactly what I needed at that moment. It was another witness to me that someone is watching out for me at every moment, providing to me what I need even when I don’t know it.

What was it about that woman? How was she able to make me feel so good without even doing anything? What can I do to have that same impact on other people? Why haven’t I been open to more opportunities for such interaction and what have I missed out on by doing so? Good things for me to think about!

It's always the little things...

Today I was assigned to speak in church on the topic of the pioneer spirit. I'm also in charge of preparing and printing the program so I knew this morning would be quite a balancing act. Finally my talk was finished and I was all dressed. I had about 20 minutes before church started which is not enough time for me to get the program printed and passed out before the meeting starts. I knew I needed to take a cab to the church to help with the process. But the closest cab stand is a 10 minute walk and I really didn't want to have to get all hot and disheveled in my church clothes when I would have to get up in front of everyone.

As I walked to the end of my street I could hear a car coming. I picked up my pace and peaked around the corner. An empty cab was headed right towards me, less than 50 feet out of my front door. I jumped in and directed him toward Longfellow Park. I knew I was low on cash and checking in my wallet confirmed I had only $8 to spare. As we pulled up in front of the church building the meter read $7.95. Furthermore,I still had 10 minutes before the meeting started.

Originally I was scheduled to speak last in the meeting but as the bishop got up to announce the program he said I would be the first speaker. (I guess one guy didn't show up so I got pushed up). I didn't have a chance to completely polish my talk or fully calm my nerves before I had to deliver my message but I think it all went alright.

All of this reminds me how completely blessed I am. It's amazing to see His hand in the smallest details of our lives. I can't explain it but even as I was headed out the door I KNEW I would be able to find a cab. I know it may sound trivial and silly to some but that's what makes it that much more amazing. Helping me get to church smoothly IS a trivial matter when you consider all the world's problems. And yet it was significant enough to get attention from my Heavenly Father. I was significant enough to get His attention.

***

As I've considered whether or not I should start blogging again, I've struggled to figure out what the style of my blog should be. My sister's recently started blog focuses on her family and kids and the funny daily happenings in their life. It really helps to stay connected. But (in case anyone has forgotten ;-) ) I don't have kids or a family of my own at this point so that's not really an option for me.

What I do need is an organized way to focus my thoughts more on gratitude. I remember when I was blogging while in Paris, I would keep my eyes open each day for something that I could include in my post. I looked at things through a different lens and probably took more pictures than I would've if I weren't thinking about sharing my thoughts with my family. I know being grateful for my blessings is important and we are told to write these things down so we can reflect on them at other times. We are promised if we write down and recognize the things we are given, we are blessed with more.

The Christmas before last I was in Germany visiting my parents with Christine, Steve & IeLi. I noticed a notebook sitting around and opened to the middle to identify its owner and purpose. It only took a second to realize it was IeLi's gratitude journal. I was actually almost moved to tears, although I can't really explain why. I knew I needed something like that in my life. I bought a pack of tiny notebooks from The Flower Basket and have carried one with me ever since. I sometimes refer to it as my Dr. Laura notebook because I record quotes and ideas that strike me (often resulting from things shared on her show) as well as things I am grateful for. I've almost filled up my last of the notebooks. Instead of buying a new little gratitude journal, I've decided I can use this blog for that purpose.
We'll see how it goes!!

hello!